Dear 22 year old self.
That breakup is hardly one part of your life. You have managed to wreck problems you never thought you could overcome, losses you thought would never take their painful shadows and leave; and wounds, you thought were adamant on never ceasing to bleed. The alcohol that looks so appealing to you right now, will numb you. You left him, for he was destroying you, now why would you want to let the glass filled with churning red liquid do the same? Instead Look at yourself in those photos. Laugh at the stupidity that surrounded you back then, and the nostalgia that grips you as your eyes glaze the pages will tell you :- life isn’t over! Those ever-smiling eyes that look back at you, will make you yearn for that life, and remember this: if you could’ve been happy then, after years when the world actually starts to make sense, none can stop that curve that brightens your face, if you really want to give it the power to. Know that if no one else does, I love you, to the individual cells of your broken heart, to the bits and pieces of your soul: I love you
16 year old self
Dear 35 year old self
A success in your career is not the be all and end all. Thick for me to say, for even now I can’t predict what you would be doing ,for which I sit, grappling and wrestling with the endless options and fears that threaten to choke me and my very spirit to do anything at all. But sure, you overcame that destitute side of me? Then why do you worry? If you need a break, take a break, wander around aimlessly, till you think you are ready to figure out the lane in life you would want to choose. I know, that when people keep telling you to start being “more responsible”, it sends shivers down your spine. Be as childish as you want, but keep yourself and those around you happy. How? That’s what life is ‘bout. Figure out its intricacies, and it will give a thrill beyond possibilities. If your contributions aren’t recognized at work, it is okay. Breathe. Talk. Talk to friends, talk to your boss and sort things out; something you’ve been learning from childhood has been to stop holding things back. And don’t be ashamed of your excessive sensitivity. Don’t be ashamed of the moistening of your eyes everytime someone says something even mildly piercing. Don’t hold back the tears, don’t dam them with your eyelids. Let them flow. Don’t be ashamed of being sensitive. Just because you are sensitive, doesn’t mean you aren’t strong enough to handle the situation, it just means you are human, maybe a little bit more than the stones who heartlessly tease you for being so.
16 year old self
Dear 71 year old self,
No, people aren’t oblivious to your existence. I know you feel withdrawn, for gradually, your legs refuse to take the long sturdy strides they managed to before, and your mind can become fuzzy at times. remember when you were 15 and had a sort of sinking feeling when the thought of growing up and taking responsibilities sprang up in your mind? Well, you got through that!!
I realize you feel old, most you loved have left. But were you really someone who needed another to live happily? Now is the time, to explore all those books you wished you could’ve read as a child, to watch movie marathons and visit 5 star hotels. Listen to music, both new and old. Don’t while away time, live it
16 year old self .
Dear self a minute before death,
I understand you are nervous and excited about everything that you will go through after closing these eyes, tired from their years of service. And yes, the questions regarding the extent of your life’s productivity and contribution in all its years, is haunting you. But let me tell you something. Nobody leaves without finishing their given task. That’s what the universes handbook says. And, just reiterating; be glad for the impact you’ve made, the achievements you’ve left behind , they most certainly count more than any of your failures. And get ready to meet all those whom you thought had left you forever.
16 year old self
Dear present (16 year old )self.
I have in no way tried to predict or position your life in a certain way. But all this is inevitable. But the one common aspect, I hope you’ve noticed, is how with time, things have gotten better. Everytime and always (a word i know you’ll love till eternity). I know you are worried for college, a new life, growing up, but remember; when you are about to die, you shall remember not these tiring problems, but the good moments; the laughter in class, the dinners with family and all the times you read harry potter. Cherish these whenever they present themselves. The rest works out.
and once more, I love you ❤